Corrupted Vows by Kiana Hettinger

Chapter Five

Caitriona

I couldn’t breathe.

A thousand memories came crashing down on me all at once, drowning me, making me gasp for breath.

I’d tried to bury the girl I’d been, but the moment I saw him, that girl had risen to life, her heartbeat pounding, her voice screaming for him inside my head.

I stopped in the small room between Nacio’s interrogation room and the stairs, and leaned against the wall.

My legs didn’t want to move, and they felt like they weren’t going to hold me up much longer.

He’d looked at me like I was a ghost.

If I could breathe, I would have laughed. Not a funny laugh; a hysterical, crazy, slightly maniacal laugh because ghosts were the ones who were supposed to do the haunting, not the other way around.

Footsteps thudded lightly on the concrete floor of the interrogation room, coming closer. And closer.

I should have run.

I should have gotten my ass as far away from him as I could.

Yet my stupid feet didn’t move.

He kept coming until he was standing right in front of me, not speaking, just existing in a world he no longer belonged.

I hated the way every fiber of my being still responded to him, longed for him.

He was like a magnet, always had been.

“How long have you been here?” Gabe asked. He sounded angry, offended even.

“Three years,” I said, my chin raised, trying to hide the hurt in my tone because there was no way I was handing that over. Nope. Not giving him that.

Gabe was silent.

His face was a perfect canvas of indifference. And when I say perfect, I meant perfect. God, he was devastatingly handsome, even more than he’d been. Deep-set, vivid green eyes, sculpted jaw and cheekbones. Lips that were just full enough to be swoon-worthy without looking feminine. And he had just enough of a five-o-clock shadow at the moment to lend his runway-worthy features a rugged quality.

I remembered this face, the mask that hid everything that was going on behind it. He never could quite control his eyes, though. They tended to give a sneak peek at what was happening in that wicked-smart brain of his. At the moment, it kind of looked like there was a volcano in there about to erupt.

But he said nothing. This silent standoff was giving me way too much to think, to remember, to wish that he’d come here for me.

But he hadn’t.

I’d seen it in his eyes—my presence here had taken him completely by surprise.

The silence stretched on until I couldn’t stand it any longer.

My insides were twisted up in so many knots, the tension was unbearable. It felt like there was no escape, and feeling trapped made me say stupid things. Such stupid things.

“It’s been five years, Gabe,” I snapped. “Do you get some twisted pleasure out of this? Do you want to rub how great your life is in my face?”

It felt like someone had taken over my vocal cords, and wow, she was one angry bitch. But my life was a carefully constructed house of cards, built entirely on things that couldn’t hurt me.

Gabe could hurt me.

He could slice me open with one word.

He could rip away all that was important to me.

He held all the power here, leaving me feeling helpless and exposed—things I’d sworn never to feel again.

“Christ, you let me believe you were dead,” he said in a tone that was somehow ice and fire at the same time.

“Well, I wasn’t,” I said, forcing my shoulders to move up and down in a way that I was hoping resembled a shrug. “I spent two years praying like hell I was, but it turns out, God doesn’t like me very much.”

“Cait…” It was a question and a warning all in one.

I glared up at him, hiding every bit of emotion behind the walls I’d built inside my head. They were strong walls, nearly unbreakable. I’d built them well, lying beneath rotting monsters who took delight in my pain and my fear. It had been one small thing I could deny them, one piece of myself I could hold back, one small power that had kept me human.

And now, those walls kept the man I’d once loved with all my being from seeing just how utterly he’d destroyed me, shaken me to my core, stolen away everything Phoenix was trying to become.

With one look, Gabe had transformed me into Caitriona again and how I hated him for it.

I shook my head. “Cait was weak. She deserved to die. So, if you want some sort of closure, there you have it. You don’t have to worry about her anymore. She’s gone. She doesn’t need to be rescued. And she sure as hell doesn’t need your pity.”

“I didn’t come here for fucking closure.”

“No, I guess you didn’t. You came here for Nacio’s charming company and ran into a ghost—I guess that was inconvenient.” I stood up straighter, feigning an indifference I didn’t feel. Not one bit.

“Inconvenient? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. My stupid eyes couldn’t help but follow the movement because I could still remember the feel of it between my fingers. Just a little too long, it always fell in this perfectly messy just-got-laid style that made every girl who saw him want to get him into bed.

“Why the hell didn’t you come back, Cait?”

“Don’t do this, Gabe. Just… don’t.” My voice cracked—stupid voice. “You moved on. You lived happily ever after, and I—”

“I did what?”

“Don’t you fucking—”

“Phoenix,” Nacio barked, striding out from the other room, making my jaw slam shut.

“Stay out of this, Nacio,” I said, glaring at him. “It’s none of your goddamned business.” It really wasn’t. He didn’t understand what was at stake here.

“Everything about your life is my business, señorita.”

“Then it’s about time you butt the hell out.” It was too much. I felt like a freaking egg with cracks all over me. The slightest tap, and I was going to shatter right in front of them. Wouldn’t that just be a wonderful end to the night?

“Calm down, Phoenix,” Nacio said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Fuck off,” I snapped, and then I did the only sensible thing I could come up with.

I got my ass out of there as fast as my feet would carry me.