A Change of Heart for the Cornish Midwife by Jo Bartlett
19
Ella got as far as her car before she started to sob. She was making a sort of guttural noise that barely sounded human and her whole body ached with grief. Every time she thought she’d managed to get it under control and regulated her breathing, it started again. Almost the last thing in the world she wanted was to lose Dan. But there was only one thing she wanted less and that was for him to stay with her and risk having to give up on all the plans he had for the future. Even if she stayed well enough for them not to have to let go of any of their dreams, the way he was acting had proven something to her. He already saw her as a completely different person. It would change any future plans they might have made, because he wouldn’t be making those plans with the Ella she’d been when they first met, or even the person she’d been when they got engaged. He’d be making plans with the Ella who had MS and that would still change everything.
Somehow she managed to drive away from the farm, but she didn’t want to go back to her parents’ place. They were worried sick about her as it was. She couldn’t face going to stay with Anna or any of her other friends, either. They’d want to talk to her about what had happened and maybe even try to persuade her not to leave Dan. She knew they all loved her, but none of them would understand.
Instead, she kept driving, out of Port Agnes and along the coast road until she reached Port Tremellien. The second hotel she tried had a room available and she booked herself in for three nights. She had no idea what she was going to do after that, but it would give her a bit of time to think about where to go next. There was one thing she wanted to do straight away, though, something that meant there was no risk of her weakening or changing her mind even though every fibre of her being wanted to.
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Hi Noah,
I just wanted to let you know as soon as possible that Dan and I are cancelling the wedding in July. It won’t be rearranged this time. We’re both absolutely fine, we’ve just decided that we’re better off apart than together.
Take care.
Ella