Wolf Decided by Tessa Cole

AUDREY

Cyrus’s words were a trap.They had to be.

I’d just defied him, challenged his authority by refusing to look away. No one did that to an alpha and got away with it.

Even if I’d only done it in front of his brother and his trusted friends, he still should have been furious with me.

Except he wasn’t, and every instinct I had told me he was being sincere, that he meant his apology.

Which didn’t help me figure out how to respond. Did I just accept it and pretend nothing had happened?

A minute ago, when I’d been filled with what had to have been Knox’s ferocious wildness — since it couldn’t have been mine — I would have said yes. But the wildness had vanished the moment I’d stepped inside, and now all I felt was a terrifying, nauseating churn of emotions that were both mine and Knox’s along with a bone-deep exhaustion.

In the back of my mind, I knew it was shock. The adrenaline from the fight, trying to save Bishop, and the fight to stay with Knox and Bishop had worn off, and I was crashing. Hard.

I didn’t have it in me to figure out how to respond to Cyrus.

“I’ll put a pack together for you.” He glanced at my wardrobe as if he could look beyond the closed doors and see that after I changed out of my ruined shirt, I wouldn’t have a spare. It wasn’t my fault my clothes kept getting ruined, but for any other alpha that wouldn’t have mattered, and I swore to myself that once I’d made myself a valuable member of the pack, I’d pay Cyrus back. For everything.

I hugged myself tighter and tried to imagine how the wildness had felt rushing through me in a desperate attempt to keep me from getting any more submissive than I already was.

I’d liked feeling powerful, liked feeling as if I had control over my life.

I wanted that feeling back.

I wanted it to stay.

“Change your clothes and shoes,” he said, his attention shifting to my feet and the sandals he’d given me when I’d first arrived in his realm. “And get back out there. They both need you, and I want Nova to give you a once over before we head out.”

“So if I’m hurt you can order me to stay?” I huffed, the words slipping out on a sudden wave of frustration.

“No.” He ran a hand through his hair, mussing it even more and releasing a heavy breath.

For a second, he looked as exhausted as I felt… and as heartbroken.

The urge to hold him, comfort him, and take comfort from his embrace as if he were one of my mates rose inside me like a great wave.

Both his brothers were in danger, and he, an alpha, had just humbled himself to the weakest shifter in existence. Not to mention he had someone running around town wielding a dangerous poison. He didn’t just have his brothers or me to worry about. He had the whole pack.

Then his expression snapped back to serious and he stood, startling me and — much to my frustration — making me instinctively shrink back further up the bed.

“Knox and Bishop need you, and you need them,” he said. “You’re going with us. Whil said she wanted your help keeping Bishop stable, and you now know how to forage, find ideal firewood, and set up a safe fire. Having you along will be helpful.”

His expression shifting into something I couldn’t recognize, he inched closer as if he wanted to… I had no idea what. Touch me? Hold me?

But then he froze and the muscles in his jaw flexed. “We leave in less than two hours. Try to get some sleep if you can.”

With that, he stormed out of my bedroom and, a moment later, I heard the door to my suite, the one leading into the hall and not outside, open and close.

I stared out my bedroom doorway into the sitting room, a heavy confusion swirling into the mix of all my other emotions.

What had just happened?

I was going to be helpful?

I must have hallucinated the whole conversation. I hadn’t done anything right in Cyrus’s eyes from the very beginning, and now I was going to be helpful?

Also, an alpha just apologized to me. Me! And that made strange, hopeful feelings warm around my heart.

I quickly showered off Bishop’s blood, trying hard not to think about how I’d gotten it on me, changed my shirt and pants, replaced my sandals with my hiking boots, and headed back to the private patio outside my suite.

First things first: reassure Knox that I was holding it together. He’d been too caught up with his failing twin bond to register my sobbing breakdown the second I’d entered my suite or my emotions from my strange conversation with Cyrus, and I planned to keep it that way. He had more than enough to worry about.

After that, once we were on our way, I’d ask Whil about the magical block she’d cast on me to keep Sterling out of my head. I couldn’t afford to be mistaken about the conversation with Cyrus and didn’t want to risk having been manipulated.

Outside, Knox had shifted into his wolf form, the stress of Bishop being near death too much for him, but I could tell he was still himself. His wolf hadn’t completely taken over, and he hadn’t lost his mind, although I could sense both of them fighting to keep it together. Across from him, Nova was finishing up wrapping Bishop’s wounds to keep them clean and Whil was gone, presumably at her cottage packing.

“Cyrus wanted me to give you a quick check,” she said. “Now that your adrenaline has worn off, does anything hurt?”

I opened my mouth to say no but made myself pause. Whether the order had come from Cyrus or not, this was a genuine question and it was best to take it seriously just in case I was injured and it got worse halfway to the pool.

My hands hurt from where they’d been caught between Bishop’s head and the ground as well as from gripping Bishop’s shirt and dragging him down the road, and the rest of me was getting achier and achier by the second from dragging him as well as a full night of dancing. But it wasn’t serious, not something worth wasting an elixir on.

My foot, however, hurt a lot more than my hands from when Bishop had convulsed and I’d dropped him.

I didn’t think anything was broken, but it was best if Nova looked at it. That, and it would give her something to tell Cyrus when he inevitably asked her about me.

“I’m a little beat up,” I told her, showing the bruises that were starting to form on the back of my hands, “but not too bad. My foot got the worst of it.”

I took off my boot and more worry bled through my mating bond with Knox as he nudged my arm with his damp nose.

“I think it’s just a bad bruise,” I added, wrapping my arms around his neck and leaning my head against his.

His rich wood smoke scent enveloped me and the warmth of our bond wrapped around my heart, steadying my soul, while Nova studied my foot.

Please don’t let it be broken. Please don’t let this be the reason Cyrus refuses to let me go.

I didn’t want to fight him again. I still felt shaky and exhausted from standing up to him. And while he’d said I was going and I’d be useful, a broken foot would change everything.

I’d challenge him again if I had to. I could feel that certainty deep in my soul. But then I’d also turn back into a shivering sobbing mess once I’d won.

Except I didn’t believe I’d broken down the moment I’d stepped into my suite because I’d challenged Cyrus and was afraid of him. I’d broken down because it was all too much. Bishop had just told me he loved me and was now dying, and the roar of Knox’s emotions, his rage and panic and desperation over the thought that he was losing his bonded twin, was threatening to drown me.

I’d been submerged under all that emotion once the adrenaline and wildness had rushed out of me, and it was a miracle I wasn’t a sobbing ball of completely-messed-up buried between Knox and Bishop right now.

“It’s just a nasty bruise,” Nova confirmed, releasing my foot. She’d felt every bone and flexed every joint and now it was really throbbing. “It’s starting to swell, so I’ve asked Eloise to bring you an ice pack. It’s going to hurt while you walk for the next few days.” Her gaze grew unfocused for a moment then she turned her attention back to me. “I’ve told Cyrus you need to ride in the cart with Bishop for the next two days. You barely weigh anything as it is, so he and Deacon won’t notice you riding along.”

“He and Deacon?” I asked, confused.

They’ll be taking turns pulling the cart,Knox said.

“Ah.” I didn’t know what to say about that. It made sense, though. Knox would need to stay in contact with Bishop, and neither Whil nor I were strong enough to pull a cart with a full grown man in it. Also, Cyrus wasn’t like my previous alpha… or at least he was somewhat different. He did manual labor and had done chores like everyone else when we’d travel north. It made sense that he’d take turns pulling the cart.

“You can do this, Audrey,” Nova said.

She stood and gave me a soft smile as Eloise hurried around the flowering shrub that made the patio private, carrying an ice pack.

“By the Sisters!” she gasped, the sight of Bishop’s bandaged body covered in horrible black and red veins making her stumble. Then her attention jumped to me. “Oh, child. He’ll be alright. Nova and Whil are miracle workers. They’ll save him. I’m sure of it.”

She knelt and gently pressed the ice pack against my foot, making tears burn my eyes.

It was such a big thing for her to think of me while one of her pack alphas was gravely ill since no one ever thought of me. No one in my old pack would have cared that my heart was breaking, they’d have only been worried about Bishop.

Knox whined and sent confusion and reassuring love through our bond, not knowing how to take my sudden swell of emotions.

I sent love back to him. “I’m okay. Just—” I met Eloise’s eyes. “Thank you.”

“Come on, Eloise,” Nova said. “They need their rest and we’ve got rations to make and pack.”

“Right.” Eloise offered me a smile just as soft and warm as Nova’s, sending more warmth radiating around my heart.

Mine,whispered something inside me so quietly I could barely hear it. My people. My pack. Mine.

The voice had to have come from Knox because if I even had a wolf, she was buried so deep within me she was never waking up.

Although maybe… just maybe that wasn’t completely true anymore.