The Lady’s Christmas Secret by Ella Edon
CHAPTERONE
Christmastide, 1823
Ashwell, Hertfordshire, England
“It is absolutely out of the question.”
George White’s voice reverberated through the dining room, causing Caroline to drop the fork she was holding; which hit her plate with a loud clink. Her mother, Katharine White, Baroness Oakham, sat next to her as silent and lifeless as always, as if she had not heard her husband’s rude response to their daughter's simple request.
“Father, you don’t understand. I haven't seen Emily in ages,” Caroline protested.
Emily Trew, her best friend, and daughter of Viscount Thunderhill, lived only a few miles away from Linford Manor, and Caroline liked to visit her often. Now, only a week before Christmas, Caroline longed for an opportunity to escape for a few hours and see her friend, knowing well that she was hardly going to have a moment to herself in the coming days with all the house preparations.
Lord White finally dropped the newspaper he was reading to look at her.
“Caroline, only a fool would go outside at the moment. Can’t you see there’s a storm brewing?” her father demanded.
She looked outside the window and had to resist the urge to grimace at her father’s statement. The gloomy countryside scenery spreading outside was as cloudy as ever, which was not unexpected as they did not get much sunlight during the winter months in Hertfordshire.
Even so, Caroline knew her father would use anything as an excuse to keep her in the house.
At nineteen years of age, she had experienced very few chances to be carefree and enjoy her life away from the vigilant eye of her father. However, Caroline felt more disappointed in her mother. She could not deny that she loved both her parents dearly. She was grateful for everything they had done for her; providing her with the best education, and giving her everything she asked for as she grew up.
Nevertheless, Caroline hated how cruel her father could be at times, and how tolerant her mother was of his ways. Meek and silent, and always complying with other peoples’ wishes, Lady Oakham never voiced her views or defended Caroline in times like these. For this, Caroline could not help but resent her mother.
“It will only be for a few hours, Father, I promise,” Caroline pushed.
Her father locked his piercing gaze on her face, and Caroline felt her confidence wavering. “I suggest you spend your time doing something useful instead of gossiping and tattling away with that prattler Trew. Women your age need to focus on becoming proper ladies.”
Caroline did not fail to notice how he had spat out the word ‘proper.’
“Father, I believe this is hardly fair. I have been mastering my skills, and Mama can attest to how my embroidery has improved – ” she paused and looked at her mother expectantly, hoping she would support her claim.
However, Lady Oakham’s glassy eyes only rose to face her for a second before dropping back to her plate.
“Not another word, Caroline. I will be in my study, not to be disturbed.”
With that, the baron stood and left Caroline and her mother sitting in silence.
“Mother – ” Caroline started but did not know how to proceed.
“You should listen to your father, my dear.” Her mother wiped her mouth on her napkin and stood, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder before leaving the dining room herself.
Caroline’s hopes of getting out of the house sunk further. She had learned to expect her mother’s cold responses, but this one made her feel like she was trying to breach an impenetrable wall and constantly failing. It left a hollow space in her heart where respect and trust should have been growing.
Caroline sat at the empty breakfast table as tears started welling up in her eyes. She always hated how her eyes teared up every time she was frustrated.
With her father’s dismissal of her wishes, and her mother ignoring her pleas for help as she always did, Caroline felt desolate. The familiar walls of the dining room, adorned with beautiful festive wraiths of laurel and rosemary adjacent to her family’s portraits, now suffocated her. The weight of responsibility and judgement fell heavily on her shoulders once again, and Caroline felt her anger turn into defiance.
Her father wanted her to be the perfect daughter, and her mother would most likely thank her if she could be as silent and obedient as she was. But Caroline was not one to give up so easily.
I will not let them control me like this, she thought.
Suddenly, the doors to the dining room opened, and their footman, Thomas, walked in, startling her.
“I’m so sorry, Miss White, I thought you had already finished,” he said as his face flushed in embarrassment.
“It’s alright, Thomas. I was just leaving,” she said and stood, leaving the servants to clean up and prepare the room for luncheon.
On the way to her room, Caroline devised a plan.
* * *
“Miss, I beg you to reconsider. Please.”
Standing behind her, Miss Barbara Grant, Caroline’s lady’s maid, was clenching her satin arm gloves in her hands with a pleading look in her eyes.
Caroline sat in front of her vanity mirror, adding a few finishing touches to her hair. Miss Grant had already done a beautiful job gathering it all up in an elegant chignon, leaving only two well-formed curls to frame each side of her face.
She had inherited her mother’s slim nose and chin, the way her eyebrows arched over her eyelids reminded her of the way her father looked from certain angles. It was the only strict feature in her otherwise gentle oval-shaped face.
Her pale complexion made the skin on her cheeks and neck stand out, revealing the slightest hint of freckles to the careful eye, now appeared almost transparent in the morning light. Her green eyes were clear of the threat of tears.
Caroline sighed, pinched her cheeks to add some colour, and looked at her trusted friend.
“I’m not a child anymore, Grant. I will not allow him to forbid me from seeing my friend.”
“But, miss, what if we get caught?”
Miss Grant, who was only two years older than Caroline, was a highly responsible, hard-working member of the staff, and everyone loved and respected her. Caroline knew she was asking too much of her by proposing they leave the house without notifying anyone; without her father’s permission.
Yet, she would never have implicated her if she thought there was any real danger of her getting into trouble.
“It will only be for a few hours, and we’ll be cautious. You’ll get to see your friends in Emily’s house, too, and we’ll be back before anyone will miss us.”
Her maid remained unconvinced. Caroline approached her, gently took the gloves from her hands, put them on, and gave her a reassuring look.
“Pleas Grant. For me,” she pleaded.
It took Miss Grant a few moments, but finally, she gave in with an exasperated sigh.
“God knows there’s no reasoning with you, miss.”
“No, there isn’t,” Caroline flashed her a smile. “Now, what do you say, the dusty pink dress or the green one?”
Three gown changes and about three-quarters of an hour later, Caroline was sitting in front of the fireplace in Emily’s parlour with a steaming cup of tea in hand. Miss Grant had joined the other maids in the kitchens, where the coachman they had trusted to drive them there in secret was keeping himself warm.
Emily, lively and chatty as always, had spent the best part of the past hour filling her in her brother’s latest adventures.
“Nellie says she heard him stumbling his way to his room in the first hours of the morning yesterday. I bet he was out all night with one of his notorious friends,” she said, her hazel eyes shining with amusement.
“I take it that all your maids make a habit out of staying up so late to spy on their masters then?” Caroline commented.
Emily slapped her friend’s arm teasingly.
“Only you would care more about that instead of the actual news,” she said. Leaning closer to Caroline, she lowered her voice into a whisper.
“It’s that devilish man, Lord Derby, who’s stolen my brother’s wits. It’s all we could have expected knowing the lord’s reputation,” Emily added.
The sound of his name sent Caroline into deep thought, as it always did. She had not seen Adam again since that Christmas night years ago.
Even though they were neighbours’ living on adjacent estates, her father harboured a hatred for the Setons Caroline had never been able to understand.
After countless insults thrown at their name through all the years, she had given up trying to figure out the feud between their families.
Adam had never tried to reach out to her in return. Instead, he had made a reputation for himself as a bachelor notorious for his particular tastes in whiskey and women.
Caroline did not know what to believe, but it was clear from Emily’s tone that she disapproved of the influence Lord Derby seemed to have over her brother.
“I never understood why men like to behave that way,” Caroline said to Emily. “Of course, they don’t have to spend all their lives locked inside their homes, memorizing poetry and volumes on good manners as we women do,” she added bitterly.
Emily let out a chuckle, shaking her head. Her rich brown curls bounced with the movement.
“Say what you will, dearest, but as long as they bear a title, all that should hardly matter. Besides, rakes make the best husbands,” she replied with a wink.
Caroline could not help but smile, but deep inside, she wished her friend behaved wiser than she spoke.
Although she would not admit it to Emily, who dreamt of nothing but making her father proud by marrying into fortune, Caroline would happily live a spinster’s life as long as it meant she would not have to face a husband she did not love. Or, for that matter, one who would make her as miserable as she guessed her mother was with her father.
Besides, having suffered her father's draconian will all these years, she would never subject herself to whatever freedom she had to the control of a husband.
She decided that she would not share any of this with Emily in fear of sounding bitter again.
Thus, she kept her smile on her face as she continued speaking. “Thank you again for receiving me without notice. My father has been difficult, more so of late.”
Emily looked at her with sympathetic eyes. “Caroline, my dear friend, there is no need to thank me! You know how I always welcome your company. He cannot keep you locked inside the house forever, you know.”
Caroline opened her mouth to respond, but her breath hitched in her throat as she heard the grandfather clock suddenly striking one. She inwardly cursed as she shot up in a panic.
“Emily, I must go; please ask Nellie to fetch Grant and the coachman. We must leave at once!”
