A Change of Heart for the Cornish Midwife by Jo Bartlett
4
The Monday after the delivery of Becky and Luke’s baby girl, Pip, was one of those rare days when everyone in the core team was able to meet in the staffroom at the same time. There were no women in labour at the unit and no home births in progress either. For once, the training that Ella and Anna needed to deliver on a new computer system that the Trust were bringing in, could be run in one hit, before the clinics and home visits scattered the team in different directions. It was nothing short of a miracle that they’d got through the whole session without any interruptions from someone in labour arriving at the unit, or a call-out to a home birth. Taking the risk of trying to have a coffee and a catch-up afterwards might have been pushing their luck, but it was so rare that they even got the chance to try that no-one wanted to pass it by.
‘Well if I can still remember any of that by the time I get home, let alone the next time I need to use the computer, I’ll be amazed.’ Gwen shook her head. ‘Why do they have to make it so complicated? It’s not like I don’t know how to use a computer; I buy everything off the internet and I can use all the apps on Barry’s giant TV with no problem. We can Netflix and chill with the best of them.’
‘Do you know what that expression actually means, Gwen?’ Bobby, the only male midwife on the team, raised his eyebrows, but anyone who’d ever spent much time with Gwen could have guessed what her response would be. She might be approaching retirement, but there was no way she’d been left behind.
‘Of course I do. That’s why I insisted we got leather when we changed our three-piece suite, even if the material is a bit cold on a naked bum!’
‘There’s no answer to that really, is there?’ Toni, Bobby’s wife, who was pregnant with their second child, laughed.
‘I’m jealous.’ Emily, one of the maternity care assistants, rolled her eyes. ‘Tinder is still proving depressing and scary in equal measure. Sometimes I wish it was like it used to be, when you could meet someone at a dance or something, instead of swiping through photos of them with their shirt off, hugging a Chihuahua to prove how caring they are.’
‘Meeting someone through work seems to have been the answer for most of us.’ Jess, who’d been on the team since long before Ella joined the unit, and had been the person to take her out on home visits the day she’d joined, looked at Emily. ‘But trust me, meeting the wrong person is far worse than staying single. There are loads of benefits to it and I was so much happier being away from my ex-husband, that I wasn’t even vaguely looking for something new when I met Dexter. Just enjoy having the whole bed to yourself and bingeing whatever Netflix series you want.’
‘And don’t forget that there are ways to Netflix and chill by yourself.’ Gwen was completely deadpan and dropped the perfect wink, making Frankie, the other MCA and Gwen’s best friend, choke on her tea.
‘On that note, I think it’s time we headed off to Truro for our scan.’ Toni looked at Bobby, who glanced at his watch and nodded.
‘Especially given how hard it was to park last time. We’ll just have to duck out of Gwen’s advice for a happy life for now.’ Bobby grinned. Gwen’s near-the-knuckle remarks were legendary among the team and they’d all be worried if she suddenly stopped. Although, Ella had to admit, it did sometimes put images into her head she’d rather not have there.
‘I need to go and start my clinic anyway, so you’ll have to wait until next time for my pearls of wisdom.’ Gwen stood up to leave, with Frankie and Emily following suit.
‘We’ve got to go too; we’re on home visits today.’ Frankie grabbed her bag, which always seemed to be bulging with textbooks since she’d started back at uni, where she was finally completing the midwifery training she’d started before her children were born. With two of the MCAs now training to be midwives, Anna and Ella had introduced a wider remit, making their jobs more diverse and broadening out the skills base in the team. It meant that the MCAs had recently begun undertaking routine home visits, in addition to supporting women on the unit.
‘See you all later and thanks for making it in for the training.’ As Anna spoke, there were a flurry of goodbyes and then there were just five of the team left in the staffroom. They were a tightly knit bunch who Ella counted among the closest friends she had.
‘How are you feeling about the fact that this would have been the week of your wedding?’ Izzy, who had just started planning her own wedding to Noah, the vicar at St Jude’s, laid a hand on Ella’s arm.
‘It is weird after counting the weeks for so long, but it’s much more important for me to have Lissy there.’ She smiled. ‘And Noah made me feel so much better about it too, reminding me how lovely early July is in Cornwall. The roses on the archway at the entrance to the churchyard will be in full bloom and it’ll be so much warmer than it is now.’
‘It’ll be wonderful and I know Noah’s really excited about taking the ceremony.’
‘I’m just glad he can squeeze it in before you guys tie the knot too.’ Izzy and Noah hadn’t settled on a date for their wedding yet, but they were trying to arrange it as soon as possible. She’d confided to Ella and the others that they were desperate to move in together, but it really wouldn’t go down well with some of the parishioners if they weren’t married first.
‘Sounds like this is gearing up for a joint hen do to me.’ Jess grinned. ‘I know you were planning a nice, simple dinner originally, but Anna’s hen do was such a laugh. Any time I’m feeling a bit low, I just need to think about Brae doing that pirouette on the ice rink in the sumo suit and it never fails to make me smile.’
‘The fact we got it on video is even better. My husband giving Torville and Dean a run for their money was priceless.’ Anna shook her head. ‘But I’m not sure a joint hen and stag do is what Dan’s after.’
‘He’d planned a quiet one too and I don’t think that’s changed.’ Ella flexed her fingers; she’d been getting pins and needles on and off, and she had a feeling it was the start of carpal tunnel syndrome, but she’d refused Anna’s offer to take her to hospital after Becky’s baby was born, and she hadn’t had time since then to make a doctor’s appointment. Niall’s sister had gone back to Ireland, and she and Dan had been helping out with Bailey again for the last couple of days. She’d been worried at one point that she was going to drop him, because her grip had suddenly felt so weak, but then it had passed. She didn’t have time for an op right now anyway, however minor, and she’d just have to put off seeing the doctor until things were less hectic. ‘It’s really important to Dan to have his friend Leo there, which rules out anything that’s not wheelchair accessible. Mind you, Leo has asked Dan to go skydiving with him for his next big birthday, so with enough planning there are plenty of options. Dan just doesn’t want to do anything that would end up making Leo feel left out.’
‘That just shows what a great guy you’re marrying.’ Nadia, who was the newest member of the midwifery team, smiled. She was Frankie’s daughter and had come back to Port Agnes from New Zealand the previous year with her two young children, after her marriage had broken up. She’d recently started dating Hamish, one of the GPs from the local surgery, and it was lovely to see her so happy again.
‘Yes, he’s not too bad, I suppose.’ Ella returned her smile. ‘Actually, Jess, while I think about it, Dan mentioned that Leo and his wife could do with your help.’
‘What with? I’m happy to do it if I can.’
‘They’re thinking of trying for a baby, which means going down the IVF route after Leo’s accident. He told Dan that Jemima’s freaking out a bit about all the interventions and having to inject herself every day. Apparently, she’s got a bit of a needle phobia and he thinks it would really help her to talk to someone who knows a bit more about it.’
‘I’m happy to share what I know so far, although it’s still early days for me. I’m due to start taking the meds that will stimulate my ovaries next week, to prep for the egg collection.’ Jess picked up her mobile. ‘What about one of the others from the infertility support group? I’m sure Nicole would talk Jemima through the whole process; she’s been through it all. She’s back on the stimulation meds now too, so she can tell her how it really is. I’ll send her a message to see if she’s up for talking to Jemima. I think she’s finding doing this again even tougher than she anticipated, after losing Gracie. To be honest, it’s not the physical aspect that I think Jemima needs to worry about, the emotional toll is far harder to deal with than the injections, even if it does feel like there are thousands of them.’
‘I’m guessing that’s the truth of it for Jemima too, but she probably doesn’t want Leo to know that. He’s been through so much since the accident and I know Jemima tries to hide the impact of that on her. I noticed her doing it all the time when we went on holiday with them. It can’t be an easy decision for either of them, but going through IVF after losing Gracie must have been an incredibly difficult decision for Nicole and James too.’ Ella could feel a lump forming in her throat at the thought of such a lovely couple having to experience any more heartbreak and she could tell it was affecting Izzy too. It was Izzy who’d cared for Nicole during her pregnancy and been the one to discover that the baby had no heartbeat, when Nicole was eight months pregnant. It had affected the whole team, but Izzy most of all. Ella and Anna had offered as much support as they could, but it was something no midwife could forget.
Izzy had helped Nicole get to know Jess through the infertility support group she ran. It wasn’t just Jess and Dexter, or Nicole and James, who were pinning all their hopes on IVF, the whole team, not to mention the support group, were desperate for good news on both fronts. Sadly, the chances of both Nicole and Jess falling pregnant from this round of treatment were pretty low, but Ella couldn’t help hoping with all her heart that they’d beat the statistics. And if Leo and Jemima decided they wanted to try for a baby, she’d be desperately hoping they’d get their dream too.
So many of her friends had incredibly hard things to contend with and sometimes she felt guilty about how easy things had been for her. Other than being dumped at the altar by her first fiancé, who’d actually saved them both a hell of a lot of pain further down the line, and an accident that had finally made her admit she was still in love with Dan, she hadn’t experienced anything really difficult. Even when things had gone wrong, it had brought her something great and she desperately wanted the same for her friends.
‘Do you know if Jemima is registered with the surgery in Port Agnes? Hamish mentioned they’re running a clinic for people with phobias and I put a flyer about it up on the noticeboard in reception here, in case it helped any of our patients. Maybe it’s something she could sign up for?’ Nadia looked at Ella, but something weird was happening with Ella’s vision again. She wasn’t even in her mid-thirties and suddenly her body felt like it was starting to fall apart. She’d be booking in for carpal tunnel surgery and getting varifocals at the same time at this rate. Ella was just glad that the weakness in her legs seemed to have passed.
‘I’m not sure, but I’ll ask because that would be great.’ Ella blinked again, but it was no good, Nadia’s face was still swimming in front of her eyes.
‘Are you okay, Ella?’ Anna moved to her side. ‘Did you go and see Hamish about the dizzy spells?’
‘I haven’t had a chance yet.’
‘I know you think it’s your job to look after everyone else.’ Anna touched her arm. ‘But you can’t do that if you don’t look after yourself first and you definitely haven’t been right lately. No excuses, make the call now and if you need one of your shifts covered to get there, we’ll sort it.’
‘I’ll have to wait until tomorrow morning; you know what it’s like trying to get an appointment. If you’re not in the queue by 8 a.m., there’s no chance.’
‘I can text Hamish now. I know he’ll find time, as it’s you.’ Nadia and Anna had her cornered and Ella couldn’t think of a way to get out of going to see him without revealing something she hadn’t even admitted to herself. She was scared. When she’d googled the combination of symptoms she was experiencing a couple of evenings before, she’d immediately slammed her laptop shut. Everyone knew that Dr Google was the biggest scaremonger around, and that no good could come from relying on the internet to diagnose what was wrong. But it didn’t alter the fact she was suddenly terrified that, just this once, Dr Google might have been right and that her good luck in life had finally run out.